Regret…we all feel this emotion. I didn’t think I would feel regret until I was old and grey, but here I am feeling regret. I love this sense of control and power I have. Being powerful makes you feel strong, like nothing can tear you down or stand in your way. You feel immune to everything. But I regret one small incident…the death of my beloved John Proctor.
I wish they hadn’t killed John. He was hung amongst the rest of the convicted. I can’t come to terms with the thought of it. John admitted that he committed adultery on Elizabeth, so he could save her. John did everything to save his measly little wife, including pushing me to the curb. I don’t regret leaving Elizabeth without a husband, but I do regret the death of John. I loved him, and within time I hoped he would love me, like he used too. I couldn’t stand being around Salem any longer. I knew Parris had money so I took it, and with that, I fled.
There was a part of me that wanted to stay, I was so powerful and controlled the town. But I knew it would only be a matter of time, before my power ran out. As I saw the witch trails come to an end, I knew that everyone would try to repair their lives, try to make them to go back to normal. Me on the other hand, I had nowhere to go. I had my girls that had followed me, but I knew it was time to leave and move onto something new. I wanted to leave before I was shunned for my actions. I had seen what the accusations of my affair with John Proctor had done to the town, and to my name. So I fled and left Salem for Boston, it would be a new beginning. Boston didn’t know who Abigail Williams was…..but hopefully, eventually they would.
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